Nobody wants to be your manager

Happy Thursday, everyone.

I'm Frank Richardson, an organisational psychologist observing the workplace with curiosity and care. Each week, I share insights to help HR leaders better understand the people behind the processes and build cultures where both individuals and organisations can thrive.

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This week in workplace whiplash 🌀

From culture clamp-downs to the silent toll of "quiet cracking," here’s what’s shaking up the HR world:

• 🤫 “Quiet cracking” is the new quiet quitting
  Move over quiet quitting, “quiet cracking” is trending as the real burnout red flag. Workers may still be showing up, but silently struggling under stress and stagnation. EY’s wellbeing chief warns of a ticking morale time bomb if empathy doesn’t follow.
   👉Business Insider

• ⚙ Major tech layoffs continue, AI reshapes workforce
  The layoff wave is still rolling. Big names like Oracle, Intel, and Microsoft are reshaping staffing as automation and AI loom large. The message: resilience matters, but humans in transition suffer real consequences.
  👉Business Insider

• 🕹 CEOs walk back flexibility: Welcome to the “big boss era”
  A growing trend: CEOs across industries are dialling back workplace flexibility, touting productivity and speed over work-life balance. This cultural reset is raising concerns about how far leaders will go to enforce control.
  👉Axios

Managers are supposed to steady the ship through cultural resets, layoffs, and burnout trends like “quiet cracking.” But when the role looks this thankless, is it any wonder fewer people want the promotion?

When I was first offered a management role, I thought I’d made it. Then I looked at the week ahead: meetings, budget standoffs, and playing therapist to people I barely trusted with a stapler. The shine wore off fast. Turns out, I wasn’t early to cynicism. I was early to the data.

In France, a new Cegos survey shows more than half of HR leaders report employees are flat-out refusing promotions into middle management. The reasons? Predictable but powerful: longer hours, endless conflict resolution, and an image problem that makes the role look more like punishment than progression.

And the story isn’t confined to France. In the U.S., Gallup found employee engagement hit a 10-year low in 2024, and managers are no better off than their teams. When the people meant to motivate others are themselves running on fumes, morale and performance spiral down together. 

The personal cost is steep, too. According to the UKG Workforce Institute, your manager influences your mental health as much as a spouse, and more than your doctor or therapist. That means taking on the manager badge often means absorbing everyone else’s stress. Without the tools to cope, the “promotion” can feel more like a trap. 

🧠 The psychology of saying “no thanks”

Behavioural science has been pointing to this for years: the role was designed to fail. 

• Self-Determination Theory (SDT). Motivation needs autonomy, competence, and relatedness. Too many manager jobs remove choice, replace craft mastery with reporting, and isolate people socially. That is a motivation killer. 

• Identity clash. If you see yourself as a builder or expert, “manager” can feel like an identity swap you never asked for. People avoid roles that do not fit their self-concept. (HBR's leadership research underlines the identity and meaning burden on middle managers.)

• Stress beats status. The title bump rarely offsets chronic strain when authority, goals, and support are misaligned. Meta-reviews on work stress and psychosocial exposures link these conditions to worse health and performance outcomes. 

Put simply: the psychology checks out. When the role undermines basic needs, clashes with identity, and loads on stress, turning down a promotion isn’t shirking, it’s rational self-preservation.

🚀 How HR can stop the manager exodus

1. Break the monopoly on leadership. Promotions shouldn’t equal people management by default. Pilot dual career ladders, job-sharing for management roles, or rotational leadership assignments so people can test leadership without being locked in.

2. Equip managers with psychological armour. Forget yet another spreadsheet training. Offer conflict-lab simulations, resilience coaching, and peer circles where managers swap real stories and tactics. Treat emotional intelligence as a core competency, not a “soft skill.”

3. Audit invisible drains. Instead of vague calls for “autonomy,” map the hidden time sinks that strangle managers: approvals, reporting loops, meeting creep. Then strip out 20%. A visible cut sends a bigger message than another wellbeing campaign.

4. Reframe the role’s purpose. Right now, the title often screams bureaucracy and burnout. Recast it as a role about unlocking talent and shaping culture. Celebrate managers who created psychological safety, grew their people, or drove innovation… not just the ones who survived the reporting grind.

💬 Final thoughts

If a promotion looks like swapping control for chaos and status for stress, don’t be surprised when people say “no thanks.” The fix isn’t another motivational poster or pep talk. It’s a full redesign of what “manager” means. One that actually gives back autonomy, competence, and connection.

If something here speaks to you, I’d love to hear it.

Until next week,
Frank

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